Bedside caddy, or kit for lonely college students?

We were wandering through Target when I stopped at the section for college students and asked Garry, "what would I need a bedside caddy for?"

We looked a little closer and saw that they had offered a very helpful diagram of what to store in such a caddy:

- remote control (for fast-forwarding through pesky plotlines and rewinding the juicy parts)
- hand lotion O.o
- tissues for cleaning up afterwards, natch!

Thanks Target, for showing kindness to lonely college students everywhere.